He is perfect.
He is handsome.
He is mysterious. He walks in a steady pace and most of the time seemingly lost in deep thought.
With that charming smile and a perfectly toned body. There is an Alpha Male aura that surrounds him wherever he goes.
He didn’t really appeal to me at first. Whenever I pass by his desk to have short conversations with colleagues who sit near him, I would notice him still looking at his computer, but smiling or laughing at times when I say something funny. Sometimes I wonder, was he really listening to me all that time?
He was not that tall but he was magnetic. Women and girls alike flock to him. He had but a bashful smile as a response to all the attention. A handsome, smart, sexy man is attractive and so much more desirable when he keeps his distance from you.
I am not really the type to approach a man aggressively but I knew how to reel in the bait. I would sneak in small conversations and message him to let him ease up a bit. Soon enough, I noticed that whenever I pass by his desk, his stares would be a few seconds longer. His smile is just … it’s just heart melting, as if you want to just cup his face and kiss every part of it.
He is opinionated. We can talk for hours about a lot of things on the phone. He asked and called me about trivial things, that sometimes, I began to ask myself if he was just making an excuse to talk to me.
We met once. Just the two of us, we talked over dinner. It was a light conversation. It was not as awkward, but I was nervous. I was nervous that it scared me. He was staring at me in full attention. We talked about work, family and such. I was so nervous I barely looked at him straight in the eye. He had a daring look that felt like he was undressing my thoughts and all that I am. Sitting across the table from him, I was guilty and scared at the same time.
I knew I was in trouble.
I should have stopped. Now, I am already at a point of no return.
I am looking at this ring in my finger, there’s another man waiting for me in the other side.
This seemingly perfect man in my eyes versus the man who has left me in the dark.
I knew it wasn’t right and I should have stopped myself sooner and now it’s too late.
I didn’t have any confession conversation with this perfect man. I don’t really know what he may feel about me, or if he had ever felt anything more than friendship. But one thing is for sure, I know exactly what I felt about him and I know it’s time for me to stop.
I deactivated my social media, I removed and deleted all other things about him.
I just need to stop and move on.
easier said, than done.